An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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