I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
thus making me awesome and them whores
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
