I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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