Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
They are going to name an STD after you.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
