Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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