I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize