There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
