He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
