id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I look better un-naked...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Randomize
