I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
