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• (310): View more from California

  I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country

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• (845): View more from New York

  They were actually really boring considering how we met them.

  (1-845): View more from New York

  howd you meet them?

  (845): View more from New York

  They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"

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• (650): View more from California

  I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW

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• (530): View more from California

  So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.

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