just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
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