I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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