Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
