Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
How external is "for external use only"?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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