I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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