This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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