went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
