Pants 0. Shit 1.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
