It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
