You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
