she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
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