And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I stole a fireplace last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize