My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
