I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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