the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
