please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
