so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
