"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
