Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
