I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
