I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
