Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
