I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
