I'm going to jail i love you
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Randomize
