i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
