So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You have to summon your inner elephant
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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