do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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