We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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