still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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