I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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