I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Randomize
