So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
