Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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