I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
never play flip cup with pint glasses
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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