so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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