So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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