My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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