My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
