Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
